Febe’s Fears

Halloween is right around the corner.  Halloween shops are popping up around town, people are putting up decorations, and leaves are turning brown.

So in honor of my favorite holiday, I’d thought I’d do the top 5 things that scare me the most.  To up the ante, I’d thought I’d do this post at the stroke of midnight.  I’ll even be posting terrifying examples of my fears.

As usual for my top 5 lists, there are rules for this list.  This list is a physical list of things.  Things that exist in the world, and not a list of emotional fears.  Fears that I could/have come in contact with.  These things make me scream or create fear in my belly at the sight of them.  Are you ready to enter into the dark, sweat inducing, heart beating world of my fears?  Let’s start off with an easy one..

5) Airplane Turbulence.

I’ve flown all my life.  It wasn’t until about 1992 when my family was flying back from California to Texas that everything changed.  We hit a really bad bit of turbulence and that’s when this fear of mine was born.  I couldn’t even watch this entire video without my palms sweating.  To this day, I have to take the maximum amount of Dramamine each time I fly or I will have a severe panic attack on the plane.  And yes, I’ve had a severe panic attack on a plane before.  It wasn’t pretty and people kept staring.  I think it’s the idea of being trapped somewhere with no way out, as the plane free falls, a long and terrifying death, that terrifies me the most.  Heck, just walking into an airport makes me super nervous.  Whew. onto my next fear. 4) Ice and Tornadoes.

I live in Texas.  Ice is a rare thing but in recent years, it’s gone from rare to almost common in February.  This year, we had at least 5 days of iced roads.  I was scared to walk on it let alone drive on it.  It was a nightmare.  I’ve skidded before on ice and it was terrifying.  Losing control of a vehicle as it careens off the road is horrible.  And you’d thinking living in Texas, I’d be used to tornadoes. WRONG.  While I’m thankfully never been in one, I’ve come awful close several times.  Every spring, there’s a small part of me that fills with dread.  Will this be the year one finally greets me?  I sure as hell hope not.  We’re heading towards the top three. Let’s keep going while I still can.. 3) Heights.

This fear could go hand in hand with my airplane turbulence fear.  At one job many years ago, Every couple of months, I had to go up a reaaaaallllllly tall ladder to scan items at the very top of shelves.  By the time I got down, my armpits, hands, head, were all soaked with sweat.  I had to take a break afterwards to calm myself down, drink some water, and generally dry off.  I’m 5’3 people.  I like the view of my world at my height.  I can’t even ride rollercoasters.  I’m not sure where this fear began but heights terrify me to my core.  I don’t even like driving on really high bridges, I grip the steering wheel when I do.  One of the few good things about living in texas? Lots of flat land.  Ok three down..two to go.  These next two are about to get..squirmy. 2) RATS (mice they are all the same!!)

Watching this video made me cringe and strange sounds of fear left my mouth.  My husband came over to make sure I was okay.  His voice made me jump.  I hate the sight of these crawly evil things.  I hate their beady little eyes, their diabolical whiskers, their hellish long thick nasty tails.  I hate the fact that they breed so easily and even worse that they seem to enjoy dark corners, inside of walls, and drink up the night.  Now after seeing this video, I’m imagining they are hanging out in my apartment walls, waiting for me to go to sleep and then pounce of my face after I close my eyes.  Then they’d scatter away like the demons they are.  I need to hug myself for a minute..Be right back.  
Okay I’m back.  Needed a break there.  Let’s hope I can fall asleep tonight.
We’ve made it to number one.  It’s a big one.  What do you think I’m most afraid of in the entire world?  What makes me scream in fright at the mere sight of one of these things?  What makes me jump on whatever’s nearby when this comes into view?  What makes my husband think someone is trying to murder me because my scream is full of such terror?  I searched you tube for the worst, most horrifying video of my number one fear.  And yeah, it’s going to take me a really long time to fall asleep after this. Here it is, my worst fear of tangible things of all time..
1) ROOOAAACCHEESSS!!!!
I am tearing up looking at this video still.  My toes are curled, and in the back of my mind I feel like they are about to crawl up the side of my legs.  My concerned husband has asked me to “stop looking at gross things before bed.”  I’m not sure what exactly makes me hate these beasts.  It could be their nightmarish exoskeletons, their tiny little legs, their brazen confidence, the fact that they could  be anywhere, the knowledge that when the world ends, they will still be crawling over our carcasses, up our noses, and chewing on our brains.  Man my skin is all tingly and feeling phantom roaches.  Wow.  What’s worst is this past January, me and my husband moved into a 20+ year old apartment complex.  Since the summer, we’ve found GIANT roaches in our laundry hamper, inside the shower, on the kitchen floor, living room floor, and living room ceiling.  I wasn’t sure if it was the extreme heat or what, but all summer I was on pins and needles.  After several sprayings and numerous roach motels, we’ve been finally bug free for almost a month now.  Let’s hope it stays this way.
I need a stiff hard drink now.  
Time to delve inside your psyche and share your worst fears.    
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4 Comments

  1. Wow. I don't have any kind of fears that are deep-seated and irrational like that. Not to sound mean at all! It's just that, sure, a couple of those things are risky/dangerous/things you can't control (tornadoes winning that category, obviously), but having such a strong psychological reaction to them is pretty intense. Have you considered or tried any therapies to help with your fears (hypnotherapy or exposure therapy, where they retrain your brain to react calmer to these triggers)? I hope you don't always feel so terrible about these things! ~Ashleehttp://ashleesch.comhttp://theDragonsHoard.bigcartel.com 

  2. Pingback: Top Fears | Annie Neugebauer

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