This week I came across an awesome article by the equally awesome Roni Loren. She talked about a great campaign called speak out with your geek out. It really got me thinking about myself. And I am going to admit something I haven’t thought about since I was an awkward teenager.
I am a tomboy. I’m a 31 year old tomboy.
I do not wear makeup, I get along MUCH easier with men or non-girly girls, I laugh at farts, and I love joking about sex. I love playing video games, debating star wars, reading comic books, and dreaming of a post apocalyptic society. Plus, I don’t feel the desire to constantly shave my legs every damn day. A little leg stubble is good for the soul.
To be honest, I dress much better than I did when I was in college. But compared to other women, I’m nowhere near as fashion orientated as others. I do not follow fashion trends nor do I buy designer brands. I will never suffer for fashion.
I’ve always gotten along better with men than women. Put me in a room of women, and I’m so uncomfortable. I feel like I have 10 arms and 1 foot. I struggle to find things to talk about with women. Even when I have children one day, I don’t see myself talking about my child non stop. I’ve very opinionated, very politically minded, and have views on the world. I’m also well read. It’s extremely hard for me to relate to women because I’m never sure what to talk about. My love life? Celebrity trends? Hairstyles? Usually it ends with an awkward smile and one of us walking away. If you are a more feminine woman and we are friends, consider yourself very lucky. It doesn’t happen often for me. My two best friends are some of the loudest, vulgar, delightfully crude yet highly intelligent women you will ever meet. I’ve had some of the most intellectually stimulating conversations and the crudest conversations with them. It’s a match made in tom boy heaven.
But am I a lesbian? No I am not. Women who are tom boys get labeled lesbian early on. Even though I wore lots of pants, never did my hair, and was more interested in computers and video games, I escaped this label. I was always chasing after some guy. Yes, I literally chased boys all through my elementary years. I chased them differently in high school but I still chased them. I even chased my husband when I first met him. I think it’s unfair to straight and lesbian women for people to improperly label someone based on their style of dress and attitude.
But despite all these masculine traits of mine, I love the sexy and the city series, and chick lit in general. How can this be? I just said I don’t like fashion and often these genres are high fashion. Well dear reader, that’s one aspect of this series. The heart of the genre is about personal growth, struggling for self identity, and relationships, both romantic and platonic. When I was younger I identified with Carrie Bradshaw, now I feel more like Bridget Jones.
To make matters more challenging, I’m writing a urban mythology chick-lit novel! At first I tried to make it high fashion but I have a hard enough time matching colors. So I listened to my main character, and after some deliberation, realized she wouldn’t be into high fashion either. Although it is rather helpful when my awesome critique partner/craft extraordinaire/fashionista pal, Annie Neugebauer Tilton,
leaves helpful fashion advice for my main character in her critique. I would have never thought about it otherwise.
Maybe it’s the growing older but these days I feel more comfortable with my tomboy-ness. There’s been times where I try to fit in, but it never worked. It always turned into an awkward pie. I’ve learned I need to be true to myself, whether anyone likes it or not.
Now, in being true to myself, here are things I often geek out about.
What do you geek out over? Also, any other tomboys out there?